[kinia]

"Who is who?"

Starring:

Hu Jintao - recently chosen Chinese leader
Jaser Arafat - Palestinian leader
Kofi Annan - UN Secretary-General
George Bush - USA president
Condoleezza Rice - G.W. Bush's National Security Advisor





George:! Nice to see you. What's happening?

Condoleezza:Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.

George:Great. Lay it on me.

Condoleezza:Hu is the new lider of China.

George:That's what I want to known.

Condoleezza:That's what I'm telling you.

George:That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?

Condoleezza:Yes.

George:I mean the fellow's name.

Condoleezza:Hu.

George:The guy in China.

Condoleezza:Hu.

George:The Chinaman!

Condoleezza:Hu is leading China.

George:Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?

Condoleezza:That's the man's name.

George:Will you or will not tell me the name od new leader of China?

Condoleezza:Yes, sir.

George:Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.

Condoleezza:That's correct.

George:Than who is in China?

Condoleezza:Yes sir.

George:Yassir is in China?

Condoleezza:No, sir.

George:Then who is?

Condoleezza:Yes, sir.

George:Yassir?

Condoleezza:No, sir.

George:Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the UN on the phone.

Condoleezza:Kofi?

George:No, thanks.

Condoleezza:You want Kofi?

George:No.

Condoleezza:You don't want Kofi.

George:No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass milk. And then get me the UN.

Condoleezza:Yes, sir.

George:Not Yassir! The guy at the UN.

Condoleezza:Kofi?

George:Milk! Will you please make the call?

Condoleezza:And call who?

George:Who is the guy at the UN?

Condoleezza:Hu is the guy in China.

George:Will you stay out of China?!

Condoleezza:Yes, sir.

George:And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the UN.

Condoleezza:Kofi.

George:All right. With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

(Condi picks up the phone)

Condoleezza:Rice, here.

George:Rice? Good idea. And couple of eggs rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?

[Saku]

Great stuff!


Got something to post to "funny stuff" too...


A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years.

He breaks into a house to look for money and finds a young couple in
bed.He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. While tying
the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets
up and goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there the husband tells his wife:" Listen, this guys an
escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent a lot of time in jail
and hasn't seen a woman in years.I saw how he kissed your neck.
If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells
you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry he'll kill us.
Be strong honey, I loveyou."

To which the wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck, he was
whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked if we had any vaseline.

I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too".

Great stuff!


Got something to post to "funny stuff" too...


A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years.

He breaks into a house to look for money and finds a young couple in
bed.He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. While tying
the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets
up and goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there the husband tells his wife:" Listen, this guys an
escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent a lot of time in jail
and hasn't seen a woman in years.I saw how he kissed your neck.
If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells
you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry he'll kill us.
Be strong honey, I loveyou."

To which the wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck, he was
whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked if we had any vaseline.

I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too".

[kinia]

Cytat:

To which the wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck, he was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too".

Saku, it's like a hand book for young couples
hmmmmm.... tested?

[Saku]

Fortunately it was a female lesbian prisoner... i had had a beer and enjoyed the show ...


CU

Fortunately it was a female lesbian prisoner... i had had a beer and enjoyed the show ...


CU

[kinia]

heh.... lucky guy

u can always count on girls having fun although i would rather watch the original version

[Saku]

[kinia]

[Saku]

[Flo]

lol nice story.
I don´t know, what I could write now ...
hmmm...
kinia + saku = love?

@saku: ich weiß wo dein haus wohnt bzw. werde ich es noch rausbekommen!

lol nice story.
I don´t know, what I could write now ...
hmmm...
kinia + saku = love?

@saku: ich weiß wo dein haus wohnt bzw. werde ich es noch rausbekommen!

[kinia]

[Thomas-P.]

Flo, thats a good question.

Gretting

Thomas

Flo, thats a good question.

Gretting

Thomas

[Flo]

thx thomas

thx thomas

[Saku]

Flo: Think about this two options here:

1st: show us the picture you're wearing that hairy - thing

2nd: wait for the first guy to run PS to modify a normal picture of you....


CU

Flo: Think about this two options here:

1st: show us the picture you're wearing that hairy - thing

2nd: wait for the first guy to run PS to modify a normal picture of you....


CU

[Flo]

I don´t make anything of it!

Cytat:

wait for the first guy to run PS to modify a normal picture of you....

verstehe ich nicht wirklich , erkläre mal @saku
es gibt im probeforum genug bilder von mir

I don´t make anything of it!

Cytat:

wait for the first guy to run PS to modify a normal picture of you....

verstehe ich nicht wirklich , erkläre mal @saku
es gibt im probeforum genug bilder von mir

[kinia]

A Canadian is having his petit dejeuner (coffee, croissants, bread, butter jam) when an American man, chewing gum, sits down next to him.
The Canadian ignores the American who, nevertheless, starts a conversation.
American: "You Canada folk eat the whole bread??"
Canadian (in a bad mood): "Of course."
American: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We dont. In the States, we only eat what is inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, transform them into croissants and sell them to Canada."
The American has a smirk on his face. The Canadian listens in silence.
The American persists: "Dya eat jelly with the bread??"
Canadian: "Of Course." American: (cracking his gum between his teeth and chuckling). "We dont. In the States we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and sell the jam to Canada."
The Canadian then asks: "Do you have sex in America?"
American: "Why of course we do", the American says with a big smirk.
Canadian: And what do you do with the condoms once you ve used them?"
American: "We throw them away, of course."
Canadian: "We dont. In Canada, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum and sell them to America."


On the night of their wedding a young couple finally retired to their hotel room. After making her preparations the bride came out of the bathroom to find the bridegroom on his knees in front of the bed.
- What are you doing? she asked.
- I am praying for guidance - answered the young man.
- I will take care of that - she replied. You pray for endurance.



An airplane takes off from the airport. The captain is Jewish and the First Officer is Chinese. It is the first time they have flown together and it is obvious by the silence that they do not get along.
After thirty minutes, the Jewish Captain mutters:
- I do not like Chinese.
The First Officer replies:
- Oooooh, no likee Chinese? Why dat?
- You bombed Pearl harbor. That is why I do not like Chinese.
- Nooooo, noooo... Chinese not bomb Peahl Hahbah. That Japanese, not Chinese.
- Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese...it does not matter, they are all alike.
Another thirty minutes of silence. Finally the First Officer says:
- No likee Jew.
- Why not? Why do not you like Jews?
- Jews sink Titanic.
- No, no. The Jews did not sink the Titanic. It was an iceberg.
- Iceberg, Goldberg, Greenberg, Rosenberg, no mattah... all same.


Two men were digging a ditch on a very hot day. One said to the other, "Why are we down in this hole digging a ditch when our boss is standing up there in the shade of a tree?" "I don't know," responded the other. "I'll ask him."
So he climbed out of the hole and went to his boss. "Why are we digging in the hot sun and you're standing in the shade?" "Intelligence," the boss said. "What do you mean, 'intelligence'?"
The boss said, "Well, I'll show you. I'll put my hand on this tree and I want you to hit it with your fist as hard as you can." The ditch digger took a mighty swing and tried to hit the boss' hand. The boss removed his hand and the ditch digger hit the tree. The boss said, "That's intelligence!"
The ditch digger went back to his hole. His friend asked, "What did he say?" "He said we are down here because of intelligence." "What's intelligence?" said the friend. The ditch digger put his hand on his face and said, "Take your shovel and hit my hand."